Hey you, I think your hubby is gay.

I have a friend who just recently got married.

I suspect her new hubby is gay.

Is this one of those things you tell to your friend's face? Or you keep it to yourself and hope beyond hope that you're wrong?

I do not believe one should get married just because "we've been together for so long."
"or why not? after all, it's time that I got married."

Either way. We had a major falling out last year and now we're more of a hi bye kinda friend.

I didn't RSVP to her wedding in another country because I felt that the invite could have been done better.For me, if you're going to have a wedding in another country, the least you could do is provide some info on where I can get accommodation, how long I should stay, where the wedding is and whether there are cheap flights over there.

Instead it was, you coming? full stop.

So, no I didn't go.

And my congratulations message to her on her Facebook, unlike others where she excitedly yells THANKS! I FEEL GREAT! You guys are great! Thanks Thanks THANKS!

I got a very curt... Thanks.

I guess as you grow older, friends drift apart. We may not agree with their choices, but we accept them. I accept that she married this man because she thought she should since they have been together forever. He is her first, she is his first. So it was a simple 1 + 1 = 2 situation for her.

I think she deserves better.

When I was with the ex, she was the type who would make scathing comments in reply to my statements.

I would laugh and say "I complained I had a back ache and somehow I ended up giving him a leg massage. Haha."

And she would say "Well, you're stupid then. Who asked you to allow yourself to be in that situation."

Or if I make a complaint about the ex, she would jump in to remind me how dumb I was to stick around.

I bit my tongue from yelling in retaliation that her then bf and now hubby may be gay.

Growing older, I learn to bite my tongue and hold my thoughts.

But in addition to biting my tongue and keeping my thoughts to myself, I also learn that some friends in life you can do without.

But, anyway,

Dear Y, congratulations on your marriage. I hope you're happy with W. (and I hope he isn't gay). I know you never liked the ex, and I am glad I walked away from a 7 yr relationship to find happiness and fulfillment. I am glad you made scathing remarks about my then relationship but I am sad you cannot see the flaw in yours. I know you have long crossed me out of your list of friends, but if the friends you put on your priority list now are truly friends, they will tell you that they have the same fears about this man as I do. They will tell you to sit back and think and not to rush into this marriage. But heck, you wouldn't listen anyway right?

I hope you're happy. Not only now when you're basking in the glow of a wedding. I hope you're happy when you realise you're now in a marriage with a man who let you go (after 5 years being together) over a weekend where his mum came over to visit and planted some doubts in his head and took you back when she left.

Congratulations.