Are you insulted that I think you're a FA?

Over the weekend I went down to Seremban for the BF's friend's club's third anniversary.
We were entertained by a fire eater, which I have to say was not really impressive. But what WAS impressive were the 5 dancers which they claimed were dancers from Quattro. So it being Quattro, and not a ciplak small town ah chi ah beng place(though best friend JoL swears its the place where ugly chinese people go to die), we expected the dancers to be quite hot.

Now, I have no problems with people and their chosen profession, whether it be stripping, dancing, pole dancing etc etc. As long as you do it with class.

So when the time came for the dancers to perform, they marched unto the stage all dressed in "trench coats" and did their hip swaying walk and sultry looks to the deafening silence of the crowd. The floor manager yelled " Are you ready for the hot girls?!"
And he got a very soft and muffled "ya" and a clap here and there. (Maybe Seremban people don't really like dancer chicks in trench coats. I dunno.)

Anyway after the intro, the girls then began to strip their trench coats into, get this, bikinis. Not just any bikinis. But bikinis with RUFFLES. MULTI COLOURED RUFFLES.



much like this one, but with orange, black AND red ruffles. actually scrap that, it was 100% uglier than this bikini. It had 100% more ruffles.

I don't know about you, but multi coloured ruffles don't turn me on. They are not sexy. They are quite frankly, cheap. And when the music blared through the loud speaker, the girls went at each other like there was a prize for the best lesbian impersonation. Can someone yell WTF?
That is not called dancing ok? It's called trying to hard to give the guys a hard on by going at each other like long lost lesbian lovers.

As the entertainment was CLEARLY not entertaining, I got to talking to one of the BF's friend who is planning to join the BF's airline as his current company was....restructuring.

K: OHMYGAWD!REALLY? YOU'RE NOT A FA?
Me: Nope. I know. People always assume I am. Because of the job that he has. K: Not only that, you have the FA look.
Me: What is a FA look?
K: You have the look la. So what do you do?
Me: I am a lawyer.
K: Oh. I am sorry. Are you insulted that I thought you were a FA?

*_*

To which I replied firmly, my sister was a FA. Why should I be insulted that you thought I worked for the airlines?

And all the could mumble was a "oh, I dont know.some people are. especially when you're a lawyer."

Firstly, it is a misconception that FA's are not intelligent. My sister is intelligent. She has a degree in International Relations with an almost perfect GPA. And as much as I would like to think that I am smarter than the BF's ex , he had to shatter my illusion by saying "oh my ex is quite smart. She is especially good with numbers. She figured out the pay scheme and informed the company that we were wrongly underpaid. I don't know how she figured out something nobody could."
oh. great. thanksalot.

And Secondly, it is a misconception that lawyers are intelligent. I have met quite a lot of stupids roaming around the courts, calling themselves lawyers. trust me. they roam amongst us.

And thirdly, if you think so lowly of them, why do you trust your lives in their hands( as well as the pilots) when you fly? They will be the ones showing you the exit, helping you with the exit, telling you what to do in times of emergencies. These girls go through months of training and every time they go to work, they put their lives at risk.

tsk tsk.

the things some people say.

hi, I'm puteh and I HAVE A BOYFRIEND!

Yesterday I bumped into a friend (let's call him X) while I was walking back to my car accompanied by another friend(let's call him Y).

While I was yakking to X, Y had, without saying goodbye or see you later, taken off.

When I finished talking to X(we spoke for like 5 mins MAX) , I turned around and discovered that Y had already taken flight leaving a cloud of dust behind. 1/2 hr later I received a text :-

"Already gone. Drive safe."

Oh, how nice of him to inform me.

So, while I was reading the text, I grumbled to the BF of how rude friend Y was, taking off without even a word of goodbye or a gentle tap on my shoulder to signal that he was going off.

I also related that X had asked me "your date (referring to Y) ah?" and I told the BF "AS IF I WOULD HAVE A DATE SO RUDE AS TO LEAVE ME BEHIND!"

Before I could even finish huffing and puffing, the BF retorts "X does not know you have a BF?"

Here is where my story starts.

What is with guys or girls who are petrified that others do not know they are so and so's bf or gf or those who cannot WAIT to tell others about their bf/gf? Seriously. If I so happen to be with the BF and I meet a friend, I am not going to push him aside and pretend he does not exist. I would of course introduce him. But I am not going to stand atop a hill and yell :-

" I HAVE A BOYFRIEND!HIS NAME IS <>! OHMYGAWDILOVEHIMSOMUCHICOULDDIE!"

I have something against people who refer to their BF's on their blogs/FB/whatnot as "BABY".(Your bf/gf has a name ok? If you want to remain anonymous, then use his initial ke or a pseudonym)
And I especially, hate abhor benci those who update their FB status with "BABY IS BACK!" or "MISSING BABY!"

Dude. I don't care about your bf. Neither do I care whether he went away, came back or is being missed by you. Seriously. If I could, I would stand in front of you and mouth the words "I DON'T CARE" in slow mo and gesture the "WATCH ME NOT CARE" with my hands while slapping you silly with my feet. (I'm bendy that way)

Now, of course it makes sense that I would want the BF to introduce me if I were to meet his friend. Only because I think it is highly rude to talk to a friend and not introduce your date to that person. There is this one particular friend of the BF whom we've bumped into twice. And twice he did not introduce his girlfriend. And twice his gf stood behind, quietly and waited for him to finish talking. And the first time after being introduced to him, he text the BF :-

"Wah. hehe."

EH?

Anyway back to my story.

So, here's what I told the BF, "oh you have not met this friend of mine. How would he know that I have a bf?"

So the BF nods.

End of story.

Actually no, I continue with my story of why nobody actually knows I have a BF. Firstly because when I was with the ex, he never attended any wedding dinners/birthday parties/law dinners/any get togethers with me. It got to a point that people thought I was play pretending I HAD a boyfriend and that I was actually secretly lesbian. And this continued for 7 years.

So when I introduced the BF to a bunch of lawyers at a BBQ which I once-in-a-blue-moon attended, many were surprised that I was not actually, a closet lesbian.

So yeah, I do not announce to the world that I MISS MY BABY, only because I do not FIND the need to tell the world how much I love him, or how much I adore him. Sure, I post pictures of him and I together but I never caption it with :-

"ME AND MY BABY."

jijik la.

When was the last time you were happy?

When was the last time you were truly, abundantly, carefree-ly happy?

I was 9 months ago and I still am now.

9 months ago when I embarked on the journey with the BF, many of my friends( close friends/best friends) tried to bring me down. They poked holes in my happiness, they called me names, they labeled me a bad friend they basically put a big fat overwhelming wet blanket over my happiness.
I did not understand the reason behind it. And until today I still do not. How can you call yourself my friend when you envy my happiness?

When two of my close friend revealed over the last few weeks that they had found love, I was happy, no scrap that, I was ecstatic. I felt thrilled that they had found somebody. Never once did I feel left out or abandoned. Never once did I feel a tinge of envy that they were more likely than not be spending more time with this new person than with me.
Never once did I bitch about the fact that they may choose to be with their partners over me.
I just felt happy.

And when over the weekend a friend told me he had broken up with his fiancee of 1 year and girlfriend of 8 years because he had fallen for another, I cheered him on. I cheered him on because I know how it is to be with someone for donkey years and still think "Is this it?"
And to have "what ifs" with people we meet. He said he felt guilty as many friends made sure that he knew how selfish he was for abandoning something he had built for 9 years and decided to pull the plug and plunge his fiancee's life into darkness.
Is he truly selfish?
How is it selfish to think that his ex fiancee deserved to be loved by someone who can love her right? What is the point of staying together out of obligation? His heart will remain with someone else and he would not be able to love her the way she deserves.
And what type of friend would make him feel guilty for pursuing his happiness?
Not me. I am not that kind of friend.

We are all entitled to our own happiness. We should pursue it to the best we can.
At the first few months to my relationship, my mother vehemently objected to it. We argued and did not speak for a few months. But one day she told me :-

"You live your life for yourself. Not for me or your father. You are only answerable to yourself."

And that is how I intend to live my life.

I'm sorry I let you down

Over the weekend, I found out that I cannot possible have another job other than being a flight attendant, if I date a pilot.

During a break in tennis (also known as me honing my non existent tennis skills) the BF's friend asks :-

"So, how long have you been with company X?"
"Er, I am not in the aviation industry."
"Oh." (I SWEAR I heard a hint of disappointment there.)

After partying on Saturday night (Note to self: When you are way past the legal age to party, it means Saturday nights are better spent sitting at home or catching a movie)

"Are you with company X or with another company?"
"I am not in the aviation industry at all."
"Oh." (Cue hint of disappointment)

Just yesterday, I met some of the BF's brother's friends.

"Where do you stay?"
"Oh, quite far away from here. You?"
"Cheras."
"Wow. That is far."
"But I think from Cheras to the airport its the same distance from where you stay to airport."
"I work in PJ."

*confuzzled (confused+puzzled) look*

"I am not in the airlines.."

ALTOGETHER NOW:-

"OH."(and remember the immense hint of disappointment)

I am sorry, I let all of you down for not being in the airlines.

But I think letting all of them down for not being in the airlines cannot compare to letting the BF's colleague's girlfriend down for being the age that I am.

Chick that I have literally just met for 5 seconds: "HOW OLD ARE YOU?"
"Oh, I am *reveals age*"
"Isn't (insert BF's name) only *reveal age*?"
"Er, yeah?"

And as usual, reeking with sheer disappointment and hampa and duka, comes the:-

"OH."

Seriously.

So, I am not a young flight attendant.

WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?!

I blame it on the BF I tell you.

Sheesh.

So, for now and until time immemorial, If anyone asks, I AM A FLIGHT ATTENDANT.

This is a $%*&!@^% Public Service Announcement

"Hey, are you free to talk?"
"Yeah sure I have some time.What is up?"
"Nothing la. I just want to talk to someone, but I do not know what to talk about."

*_*

Firstly, let it be known that I HATE/ABHOR/DISLIKE/FIERCELY OBJECT/BENCI TANG TERAMAT SANGAT talking on the phone when, you call me :-

a) and narrate your train of thought;
b) mumble to yourself;
c) ask me the same bloody questions over and over again;
d) tell me irrelevant things like why you cannot go past the toll at 4.45pm, but 5pm is ok;
e) ask me for a favour, then retract the request, then change your mind, then ask again and then retract...;
f) whine. about the same things you whined about last night, and the night before, and the night before that and last week and the month before; AND
f) just because you are free, and you have nobody else to call.

... seriously.

This privilege of calling me and saying absolutely nothing of importance is reserved for family only. That is because I cannot choose my family. I am stuck with them and hence I love them and hence they have privileges which DO NOT attach to our friendship which does not bind us by blood.

And secondly, if I did not pick up the call the first second and THIRD time, chances are :-
a) I AM BUSY and/or
b) I AM IGNORING YOUR CALLS.

So please, for the sake of humanity, do not call me again. and again.and again.AND AGAIN.

It makes me think that by golly, something must be really wrong!
Only to be proven dead wrong when I call back because you just wanted to ask me something irrelevant like "eh, do you have any movies to recommend ah?"

So, yeah, I get antsy on the phone when you call not because I am impatient, but because YOU'RE SO BLOODY ANNOYING.